


Tear in my heart

by Midnightgirl876



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Declarations Of Love, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Minor Character(s), One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-25 09:38:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15638091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnightgirl876/pseuds/Midnightgirl876
Summary: You shouldn’t feed them you know”“Why shouldn’t I” inej asked“They’re ruthless creatures hated misunderstood”“Just like us?” Her voice was dreamy ,her eyes wide ,glistening like dark gems. ~~~~~~~~~~~Take a trip into Kaz’s mind his point of view . His thoughts and feelings on inej and the group. Read and comment X





	Tear in my heart

**Author's Note:**

> I have been thinking about writing this for a while I hope to enjoy . I am still writing the dregs and the Mascarade party But I really needed to write this. Enjoy ♥️

Tear in my heart  
1)Kaz remembered seeing her the first time . The Menagerie lights burned low men of all ages looking for a bit of lust . A facade, gilded cages with girls from all nations decorated in peacock feathers . The Zemeni girls with pale gold silk were dancing on a large stage . Kaz glanced at a affluent looking man ,wearing a plush crimson coat. His hand firmly gripping onto a Kaelish girls romp.Ridiculously large sums of money thrown up in the air like confetti. Kaz could feel hungry eyes burning through his black tailored coat . As long as none of them got too close . People were captured from their home land and forced into an indenture; sold as slaves unable to read one single word of Kerch. Kaz only came for information he was steadily making his way to Tante Heleen’s parlour and then he heard a voice “I can help you” . He turned around his heart jumped slightly , how come he didn’t hear who was behind him? His gaze focused on a small Suli girl she barley looked fifteen;her lean body draped in false cheap silk. Kaz acknowledged her for a moment and walked off . The deep Ketterdam night enveloped him , he had a plan.

2)He remembered the night of her first kill . Her tunic was covered in blood that wasn’t hers. Kaz looked at her not saying a word ,he knew Inej’s perspective of death was far different to his . The night of Kaz’s first kill was just another step to pay the debit of Jordie’s death . He remembered the hot slippery blood running down his gloved fingers . The cold metals blade pricing through the boys skin . “Please please let me go” Kaz laughed bitterly  
“My brothers gone because of you” he pressed the blades sharp edge deeper into his side . The boy whimpered helplessly he knew how this was going to end. And just like that Kaz made a deep slash below the boys arm almost cutting through his heart . He left the boy battered and bruised bleeding in the alley . Now as he looked into Inej’s glassy eyes he knew that taking another life was hard for her . “The jobs done Kaz” and she walked out the door like a willowing ghost disappearing into mist .

3)Kaz remembered the restless nights twisting and turning in his small bed at the slat . His head was plagued with thoughts of Inej , he knew it was wrong after everything that she’d been threw. But still his mind wandered to her bronze skin the deep liquid pools of her rich brown eyes . His lips tracing over every part of her skin . Her mouth opening slighting whispering his name over and over again . He imagined the soft waves of her ebony hair like a canopy around them both ;There bodies joined together as one . Kaz forced the image of Jordie’s rotting blotted body into his mind. He could see Jordie’s pale cracked skin ;His brown eyes diluted dull devoid of life . The murky dark water swallowing him whole he couldn’t breath . Withering hands covered in angry red sores grabbing him pulling him under so deep so far not even the devil could bring him up . Now in the bed he could feel bile rising in his throat and this time he couldn’t swallow it down. He swiftly got up and was sick in the wash basin . After he cleaned up the remaining mess he climbed into bed ,he couldn’t sleep without his gloves on tonight. Inej would have to wait. 

4)He remembered the early mornings in the slat Inej’s small frame perched upon the window sill feeding the crows that gathered outside. Her hair was tied back in the same ruthless plait. The cold Ketterdam air from the harbour floating threw the room . “You shouldn’t feed them you know”  
“Why shouldn’t I” inej asked  
“They’re ruthless creatures hated misunderstood”  
“Just like us?” Her voice was dreamy ,her eyes wide glistening like dark gems. There was a deep silence for a while.  
“Yes like us”  
“I still think they deserve food Kaz some of us need redemption even if we don’t want it” this time Kaz did look up from his papers they stared at each other they both knew what she had meant. Inej looked away first Inej’s words ran over in his head . “Some of us need redemption” he was sure as hell that redemption couldn’t save him nothing could . 

5)he remembered the miserable days without inej by his side when she was taken captive by Jan Van Eck. His mood had changed ever so slightly as if every question the group asked him almost exploded him into rage. Kaz felt disoriented he never let someone have this power over him before . Or was it even power ? Or something else entirely. He didn’t want to know . Kaz also knew that he was being harder on the group especially Jesper. He knew that it wasn’t just his fault but he needed someone to blame for his stupid decisions. Jordie’s name rung in his head , just like he blamed Jordie for not being smart enough cautious enough . He had wanted to best the system that couldn’t be bested . Jordie wanted a short cut blinded by ignorance and confidence unaware that he was digging his own grave and Kaz’s too. 

6)Kaz remembered them all together at Van Ecks mansion or now Wylans . He remembered the relief he felt when he saw the boat moor in and then the shock of Matthias cold blood soaked body laying on the pale green grass. He wasn’t going to lie Kaz and the big Fjerden didn’t see eye to eye but then again no one did with Kaz. But he was going to miss teasing him ,he could see the dull helpless look in Nina’s eyes .Kaz knew what it was like to lose someone who you thought u would never lose. His gloved hand met with Nina’s as the others said there goodbyes . Night birds began to sing as the boat drifted further and further away . Kaz left the group staring out in the distance . Well when there’s an end there’s a beginning.

7)He remembered sitting in the expensive looking dining room of Wylans mansion . Jesper was flirting as if his life depended on it and Wylans face flushing every time. Kaz’s bare fingers were touching Inej’s he admired the contrast of his pale skin against her deep bronze . As soon as Jesper spotted inej and Kaz he did a wide grin .  
“Looks like Kaz is gloveless and is no longer loveless” Kaz lifted one eyebrow In utter confusion ,Inej just laughed .  
“See at least she gets it”  
“I think that’s quite enough Jesper time for the toast?” Wylan said Kaz was grateful he didn’t know how much of jesper’s jokes he could handle. “Yes one more thing”  
Jesper got up and vanished through the kitchen door and when he returned he help a bowl of slightly burnt biscuits.  
“Try one I have improved the recipe” Jesper said with a wink. They all took one Wylan took the first bite .  
“Hmm better than the first try” then it was Inej’s turn she bit into the biscuit and opened her eyes in shock . “Wow Jesper you have really made some improvements” then they all looked at kaz , slowly he picked up a biscuit and bit into it the gooey chocolate entering his tongue he hadn’t had anything sweet since Jordie was alive. He made a mental note to steal some when no one was looking. “It was adequate” his voice was flat ignoring the longing for more. Jesper’s mouth hung open “did I just get a compliment from dirty hands, bastard of the barrel”  
“Just count yourself lucky”  
“And now I would like to toast said Jesper  
This toast is dedicated to Us all but mainly our little hero Inej she saved us from death and now she is going on her own journey to save others . I think I can say for all of us and Nina even though she is not with us physically we are extremely proud of you . You are the wraith after all don’t die in us now” Jesper finished off and the all drank to that. Kaz watched as Jesper stretched out his hand to Wylan and as all there hands joined inej held her hand out to him . For the first time in a long while he felt connected;the group stayed like that for a while until a maid knocked on the door . “I have a letter for Miss Ghafa” Wylan directed her to Inej. “It’s from Nina” the group fell silent it had been six months since the ice court job and the jobs that followed after since they heard from her . “She wants to meet me in Ravka and she has plans to visit Kerch again”  
“That’s great inej, Jesper and I have business trip there in a couple months time” Wylan said smiling  
“The return of the crows” cawed Jesper  
Then it was time to leave they all said their goodbyes Wylans mother even wished them a goodnight. Before they opened the door Kaz grabbed Inej’s arm breaking the distance that kept them apart for years.  
“Kaz “ her voice was barley a whisper a short breath and it was killing him .  
“I’m going to miss you wraith” his arms were wrapped around her waist , her long lashes framed her brown orbs. Then there lips were together passion , desire years of imagining and now she was here. It wasn’t cracked sore flesh it was the smooth brown of Inej’s skin . It wasn’t the smell of rotting corpses it was the subtle lavender of Inej’s jet black hair. Her lips were so soft so warm , he could still taste the chocolate from jesper’s cookies on them. Slowly they broke apart her eyes were glistening like lost stars . Not far off Kaz heard a wolf whistle and then he remembered that he was still at Wylans house . Inej has blushed a faint pink “I think we should go” Kaz’s heart was beating so fast he had no control he rubbed his hands over Inej’s as the walked out into the Inky ketterdam night. 

 

8)Now Kaz sat at his office at the slat inej had left and word of a new pirate had filled the coffee houses. A small Suli girl with a skill for knife work has been slaughtering world wide slavers the pleasure houses were slowly shutting down one by one brick by brick. All thanks to the wraith ,together they had taken down their demons; Tante Heleen was no where to be found but it is said to be hiding somewhere off in the country many of the girls have been freed and have gone back to there homeland or joined the dregs . The crow club was booming in business and he had opened a new gambling den were the Menagerie had once been called The Stolen Gems at ether side of the door there was a picture of a crow it’s beak had a large crimson coloured gem inside. Kaz was reading one of Inej’s letters about information and business . She wrote about Nina and how she was copping with Matthias death and how Wylan was doing extremely well in his fathers place. And how Jesper was standing up for Wylan no matter what and how she was able to visit her parents. Kaz couldn’t have been more proud he put down the letter and took a sip of his coffee and thought that’s my girl.


End file.
